What to Expect When Your Bff Is Expecting

Pregnancy brings a flurry of emotions - happiness, joy, fear, panic, and anticipation. When your best friend tells you she is pregnant, you might immediately experience many of the same emotions depending on her situation. Does she need a confidant throughout these nine months? Or has she turned to you for advice on next steps?

If the pregnancy was unplanned, your friend might want help regarding the next steps. Ask her if she wants to hear your advice, or if she would prefer to make the decision on her own. For this stage, your friend will probably just need a confidant and friendly smile.

If she asks for your advice, then you can outline her three options. As with any pregnancy, your friend can have an abortion, carry the child to term and offer it up for adoption, or carry the child to term and become a parent. Each choice will result in a severe emotional change in her life.

If your friend decides to have the baby, your support across the next nine months can positively impact her health and well being. Many studies find the main cause of stress for expectant mothers is a strained relationship between her and loved ones.

Supported pregnancies report stronger mental health and less concerns regarding finances and work. Supporting your BFF through this process can make great strides in strengthening her immunity, emotions, and stability when problems arise. This support can be both emotional and physical.

There are many everyday tasks that become difficult or impossible during pregnancy. Spending some time over at the house to take care of minor chores such as cleaning surfaces with cleaners she can no longer use or changing cat litter can protect both your friend and the baby.

Make sure to also offer to help with the heavy lifting as even lifting a bag of cat food can become impossible in the final trimester. Especially if your BFF is tackling this pregnancy alone, companionship can quickly become the biggest blessing. Offer to accompany her to doctors appointments, buy some important vitamins like prenatal plus.

Spend some time with your friend asking questions and genuinely listening. Pregnancy is accompanied by a myriad of concerns, from birth to parenting. While you probably don't have all the answers, listening can go a long way. Even if her concerns seem disproportionate, now is a time to set preconceptions aside and focus on her fears for the future.

Additionally, suggest some counseling before the child is born. Beginning this process early can soften the blow of postpartum depression. Finally, while you might want to offer your years of advice or the newest article you Googled, realize that pregnancy is a very personal experience for everyone involved.

Let her make the decisions and never try to force your knowledge or advice unless specifically asked. Also, if your friend decides to give the child up for adoption, help her research some family planning options.

Throughout the next nine months, optimism and flexibility are key. Even if your BFF has been planning her family for years, your excitement and adaptability are still key. Celebrate her victories and understand her concerns. No matter her situation, she will probably be terrified about the future. The most calming gift you can offer is your happiness.

Additionally, take some time to be friends. Plan a movie night or go out for some ice cream. Remind her that your friendship still matters no matter the circumstances.

Pregnancy represents change for all involved. Make sure that you hold tight to your friendship through it all. While her world might get cluttered with breast pumps and pink blankets, you have the power to help her stay grounded and focused on herself through it all. At the end of the day, she matters just as much as the person inside her.